Stage One : The Destination

If you aim at nothing, you'll hit it every time.

 

In our post on creating a roadmap for your student, we said to start with the end in mind.  But how do you choose a destination?

Ken Coleman says that we should operate in what he calls our "sweet spot", that is the intersection of our passions and gifts. To help our children determine a destination, let's help them figure out their sweet spot. 

Remember, leading our children in finding a destination for their roadmaps is a continual conversation.  

Here are some questions that we can ask to help our child figure out a destination: 

  • What do you love doing?
    • This is not a passion driven question, but more a satisfied question.  God has given us unique gifts and interests.  What has He given you? Do you love working with your hands? Learning? Reading about new things? Do you like working with numbers? What do you find yourself being drawn to each time you're given free time? For example, when my children are given time to pursue their own interests, I can find my 15 year old son in 1 of 3 areas: reading, building in the workshop, or testing out a new creation.
  • What are you really good at?
    • This can be a hard question to answer for yourself.  So ask a friend.  What would your friend come to you about because he knows that you are really good at it? 
  • Out of all of the courses you've taken thus far, which was your favorite and why? 
    • We all have those courses that we don't like, but what course do you save til the end of the day because it's almost a reward? Or which course do you look forward to attending and why? Be careful.  You may like your biology course, but it may be that you really like the people in the class or the fact that it's in community at the local college.  
  • If you were given a single day to do whatever you wanted, what would you do?
    • If all expectations were removed from you, and you were given the gift of a day, what would you do?  If you are a task oriented person this could be hard to answer, but try to eliminate all of those "need to do" tasks and focus on hobbies, thing you do just for fun. 
  • What skills are you interested in developing?
    • Every task requires a skill.  What skill are you interested in?  This could be something silly like wanting to know how to juggle to something serious like learning to type quickly.  
  • Do you have any interest in going to college? If so, what would you study?
    • Does the idea of college scare you or excite you?  Do you see yourself doing well and enjoying another four years of intense study? This question should be answered independently of whether your desired profession requires college or not.  
  • Who is your hero? 
    • Of all of the people that you've met or studied.  Whom do you respect the most? Why? What is it about this person that makes you want to emulate her?
  • Why are you pursuing an education? 
    • Why are we here anyway? Are you doing these things just because you have to in order to graduate from high school and move out. or do you see the deeper meaning? 
  • If you could do any job in the world, what would it be?
    • If the world was your oyster and you could do anything you wanted for a profession, what would it be? This one can be hard, because the sky's the limit and it could seem unrealistic.  But the answer reveals something very special about the person. 
  • What are your financial goals in life?
    • Let's talk turkey.  Do you plan to get married? How do you plan to provide for a spouse and children? Do you want to own your own home? Do you plan to borrow money to buy a home? What about cars? Do you love the new cars? Then you need to make enough money to buy them.  What are your thoughts on debt?  

In truth, these questions are part of our conversations with our children throughout their childhood.  Why not start discussing them now? For out of the answers to these questions, comes the destination.  

 

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